Tuesday, June 12, 2007

DO YOU REMEMBER?

Every so often, I get to watch my 1yr.old nephew, Mason, for my brother and his wife. Today was such a day. We always have great fun together. I get to relearn how to make all of the funny faces and weird noises (which we should never forget), and he gets to figure out where all of the places are that are not baby proofed (which are more numerous than I ever knew). A good friend of mine called during a quiet moment ( she has 3 kids which include two very active preschool boys), and we were discussing the uncanny abilities of toddlers. I was bemoaning the fact that I still had dishes in the sink, crumbs on the counter, and pajamas along with fuzzy robe still on my body and it was already 8:30 in the morning! That is when I noticed the silence on the other end of the phone. And this was the ensuing conversation. “Janece, are you still there?” Silence, and then, “Shellie, I can’t believe it but you have really forgotten!” she said. What was she talking about? What had I forgotten? “Forgotten what?” I asked. Then my sweet friend, Janece, who I can always count on to tell like it is, did. “You, with your 4 kids, have actually forgotten the world of preschool moms. Don’t you remember what it was like to have a list a mile long only to walk aimlessly in circles with a little one trailing you singing ‘The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round’ at the top of their voice? Don’t you remember never quite finishing anything, because you were never sure you started it in the first place? How could you have forgotten?” Did I really forget? Have I allowed those hard lessons to fade away into the drama of school age children? I do remember having mascara on only one eye! I do remember that spot from baby “goo” on my left shoulder that never quite came clean. And I definitely remember the loneliness of days spent with humans that needed a translator, and I was it! Do you feel alone? Have the ones who should understand, forgotten? I remember so many times feeling that my house would never be clean again, or the laundry would never get done. Would I ever look, feel, or even smell like a woman again. There were days that I swore if someone touched me or pulled at me or called my name one more time, I was going to snatch that very person bald headed! Most of the time, I was just tearing out my own hair! But I also must remember the ice cream kisses and the “You’re the best mommy in the whole world!”cards. I must remember that sticky hand that firmly held mine when we walked into their class on that first day of school. Maybe it was my hand that was firmly holding theirs for fear that they would let go too soon. (Can I tell you that, in my opinion, they did!) How can I forget the rainy days that I actually let them outside to play in the rain and the joy that literally shined from their faces on the cloudiest of days. Talk about His blessings raining down!
Janece was right this morning when she pointed out most sincerely that I had forgotten. The worst thing we can ever do is to forget to remember. We must remember those days of toddlerhood so that we can appreciate the teenage years. We must remember those seemingly endless days of loneliness so that we can be there for a mom who is living our yesterdays. For those of you whose children are older, find a young mother and babysit while she goes to the store alone. Or better yet, pick up her little ones while she stays home and does whatever she wants! For those of you with young children, please don’t ever feel ashamed or defeated because you can’t do it all. God called you to be a mother. Do it well, do it in His strength, because I promise there will come a time when you might just forget. Believe it or not!


In His Grace and Mercy

1 comment:

Slaybell said...

Shellie, I read your blog with tears... how right you are little one. Very good and right to the point.. where in the world did you get such insight? Love, Mom